Ah, my threat to sue must have worked. Baseball’s not gonna strike this year, folks. Yep, a tenative agreement has been set through 2006 where owners will get their luxury tax and more revenue sharing while agreeing not to eliminate any teams between now and 2006. Does that bode well for a return of the Washington Senators? It certainly improves the odds more than a strike would have.

So baseball’s about to commit suicide and go on strike today because everyone wants money. Owners want money, players want money, money money money money money. BAH! You know what? IT’S A SPORT!!!! It’s not supposed to be about the damn money, it’s about the game and the fans. You’re freakin’ entertainers, sideshows to the real world. You are there to play a sport and make us happy. You are insiginifigant, worthless, if you go away, we don’t care, cause, guess what? The world keeps turning.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m a huge baseball fan, but I’m tired of this crap. Players are making millions a year to hit a ball with a stick or make sure the ball doesn’t get hit, depending on the position. Owners are making millions by spending millions on a bunch of guys who get paid too much to hit a ball with a stick or make sure the ball doesn’t get hit, depending on the position. Screw you all.

Dave Ross has a kick ass idea. Let the players strike. Then we can SUE THEM! Yes, that’s right, class action, baby. Look, how many of these stadiums were built with tax dollars on the promises of jobs and money flowing back into the community? How much money does the community lose if baseball goes on strike? Now, that looks to me like baseball not holding up their end of a contractual agreement and that’s not right. Baseball’s scamming the public! There ya go, grounds for a law suit!

So, yeah, let baseball strike. I can go to a freakin hot dog stand to get the food for cheaper, I can go to a park to see a ball game and I can turn on the television and watch football for my sports entertainment. Freakin’ overpaid cry babies.

It’s Jesus!

“Do you have a Jewish or Christian Site or Christ or the Messiah or Jesus Christ and or God Following Related site or Personal site or Business Website? If you do you are required to put the below graphic and link to this TJCG Site.”

Well, “Ted Jesus Christ God”, I’ll link to you. Am I saved? And why would a Jewish site be required to link to a site about some guy claiming to be the second coming when they don’t believe in the first? Gotta love nutballs.

So, remember:

“Sites Authored by Ted Jesus Christ GOD are the MOST IMPORTANT SITES on World Earths Internet.”

Seems Target was selling racist apparel and supposedly didn’t realize it. Hats, t-shirts and shorts with “88″ on them, 88 standing for Hitler as H is the eighth letter of the alphabet. Or something like that. “We’re a family-oriented store,” said assistant manager Todd Blackwell. “We took them off our shelves. We sent e-mails out to the other stores.” Of course, racists or no, it’s always nice to see a family oriented store selling shorts with the words “FIGHT FIGHT” on them with bloody skulls and stuff.

Michael Jackson supposedly has a desire to play Edgar Allen Poe in a movie about the writer’s life. He’s supposedly getting acting advise from Marlon Brando. Meaning Jackson’s going to put on a hundred pounds and mumble.

RIAA hacked

Let’s play make believe. Let’s pretend you signed a lease for a $2500 a month loft on September 1st, 2001. Then let’s say you were at your job on the 104th floor of the World Trade Center’s north tower on September 11th, so, given what we know about that date, you sadly didn’t make it out. Let’s say your land lord didn’t care and threatened to take your family to court to get their money. Let’s say a few choice things about the landlord.

The Moon Landing was a Hoax!

Coffee Pot Ghost!

Brandon Carr’s funny as hell.

Saddam’s To Do List

So my mom and my baby bro move out to Fresno, California and then an article comes out about it leading the state in reported cases of chlamydia. Now, this has absolutely nothing to do with them moving there (at least, I’m pretty sure, and if it does I really don’t want to know) but I just needed something to …. um…. I have no idea what I’m typing. Sucks when I start typing something and then completely lose my train of thought and have no idea where I was going. Oh well.

Next time you’re in the grocery store, watch for exploding tomato paste.

Bin Laden’s in Iraq? Someone must have seen the postmark on that letter he sent to the Afghani people.

Gwyneth and Steve - Our Struggle to Have a Baby Where Steve Martin tells of his quest to have a child with Gwyneth Paltrow.

Planet Prostate

665 things Well, eventually.

Linkdump’s kinda cool.

Say hello to Simone.

A goose fitted with a £3,000 electronic transmitter to chart its migration has been tracked 4,500 miles (7,245 kilometres) by satellite - to an Eskimo hunter’s freezer.

Daniel Strouss, 19, was attending a Phish concert last year when Eric Kassoway sneaked up behind him and yanked up his underwear, according to testimony at a hearing Thursday.

Strouss, of Richboro, held a grudge for months before shooting Kassoway on June 12, authorities said.

Dear Afghanistan,

Hey, long time no speak! I’m sorry you got the shit bombed out of you because of me, but it was for a good cause. All of your suffering is really neat in the eyes of Allah and he will reward you in the afterlife. Really. Keep on keepin’ on and I’ll be back soon to fight along side of you once I get over this horrible rash. You know how it is.

Love,

Osama

PS - I’m not dead yet.

While this may be a day late for some of you folks, if you need to make a graceful exit from a one night stand, maybe this will help. Best excuse: “I started to get the beer shits and didn’t want to taint your bathroom.” Now I want to have a one night stand JUST to use that line.

BECK’S NEW ALBUM!!!!!!! Well, not the whole thing, but a good chunk of it. It comes out in September, but if you can’t wait until then, you can listen to a bunch of it online through his website. How cool is that?

Have you taken the Google quiz? I haven’t either.

First there was Jimmy Hendrix, now there’s the Holy Land Experience. Or was the Holy Land Experience first? You know, with Jesus and all. Or, hell, that whole Old Testament before it. Oh well, who can argue with a museum/amusement park based on the Bible?

Please help feed Celine Dion.

A New Zealander has been charged with altering a woman’s name to Fat Ass on an electoral roll.

The new McAfrika’s causing a stir in Norway.

Does John Ashcroft’s ‘Camp Plan’ Actually Exist? (Yes, yes, it’s from Right Wing News. Leave me alone.)